Why They Really Join the Underground
by mecca-dog
Summary: Just a funny little diddy about why the ladies really join the underground. v.dumb, don't shoot me!
1. Chapter 1

A new, totally pointless story everybody! Oh and I owe stardust03 a cyber muffin for being my first ever reviewer!

/ O O O /

-- have a muffin, they're good and fresh!

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: don't own, don't sue.

Why do they laugh!

(God, that is a weak title)

'Why are they laughing!' thought everyone's favorite KG rebel, as he walked down the hall of Underground HQ.

Currently about 2/3 of the female Underground members were in the same hall, all of them giggling as he walked past them. Torn honestly couldn't figure out what they were laughing about. His fly wasn't unzipped and there wasn't anything on his face. Maybe a few of his dreads were coming lose? He ran his hands over his and that theory was dispensed with too.

Finally, he made it to his destination, the briefing room. He had to meet The Shadow on what they were going to do with the kid. He entered the large room and shut the door, thankful to finally be away from all that annoying laughter!

As soon as the door hissed shut, all the girls crowding the hall way broke into small clusters and began to whisper and giggle hurriedly.

"OH MY MAR, did you see that but!" One girl squealed. "You could bounce a quarter off of it!"

"He so tall! He needs to cock his head to get through the doors!" another exclaimed, drooling slightly.

A particularly bold one purred, " His ears are HUGE! You know what they say about those ears..."

"Did you see me when he was asking Denny about something? I swear I nearly fainted from that husky voice of his! He must gargle nails every night to keep it like that!"

Yes, as you've probably already guessed, these ladies are talking about our own Tattooed Wonder, Torn. What other reason do they have to join the Underground by a hot piece of man flesh like him? Who cares about taking down an evil dictator when you can ogle a guys perfect little backside on a daily basis? Speaking of TW, he was finally done with his meeting and was now leaving the briefing room... just as a guy was entering with a **enormous** bucket of water to water the shadows plants. (You knew this was comin')

_SPLASH_!

The water, obviously, went all over the chest of our husky-toned hero, drenching his shirt! So, being a bright young lad, Torn told the guy no problem and removed his shirt, in order to get another. The result of this was about 60 or so Underground members fainting dead on the spot from seeing a wet Torn's bare chest.

"Well, at least all of the laughing stopped," mused our still oblivious ex-KG as he walked to his room to obtain a new top.

yeah, that had nothing to do with my other story, and was brought on from watching the credits of Jak3. You know, the part where you can make the characters move around and stuff. Come on, don't tell me you weren't totally checking out all the guys! Liars, liars pants on fire! Lol


	2. Scratch that, make it the FL!

Hey, I wasn't gonna have another chappy, but people liked it so I wrote another one !

Disclaimer: I don't need to say it again do I?

Why They Really Join the Underground

Chapter 2:

Scratch that, Make It the Freedom League

It was two weeks since the downfall of Metal Kor and the heros of Haven City were all busy rebuilding the town. Currently, three of them were located at the newly built Freedom League HQ, in the large garage in the back of the building, moving zoomer parts inside to be fixed. These three were the gun expert, Tess; the beautiful mechanic, Kiera; and the newly appointed commander, Torn.

"Thank Mar you're here Torn," said Tess, "Kiera and I are so weak, we'd never be able to get all these parts in here without you're help. You're sooo strong!"

The blonde bomb shell and her petite friend traded sly grins.

"Sure, it's no problem," the tall, dread locked man replied, wiping his sweaty forehead on the back of his hand. An unexpected heat wave had gripped the city that morning of January 26, and was making everyone's work unbearable. It had to be 80, maybe 90 degrees in the garage and Torn was soaked with sweat.

"Torn, it's so hot in here, you must be dying!" stated Kiera, her big green eyes lighting up with mischief, "Why don't you take off that heavy t-shirt? That outta cool you off a bit."

"That might not be such a bad idea," he replied, his already husky voice getting lower in the extreme heat. He grabbed the bottom of his long sleeved black tee and pulled it up over his head, revealing a perfectly sculpted chest, arms that seemed to be chiseled from marble, and the most well-defined, perfect 8-pack on the face of the planet. He was sweaty making his already golden toned skin glow, which in turn looked bitchin' against the black ink of his tatoos.

Torn threw the shirt to the side and continued to move the boxes inside, totally oblivious to the two girls drooling and panting over near the forgotten shirt. Finally, he was done.

"Anything else?" he questioned, his icy blue eyes looking confused by the girls flushed appearances.

"Nope, we're good," answered Kiera in a voice that suggested she'd just seen a god.

"Um, okay. See you guys, um, around then," he said as he left the garage, still highly confused.

Once he was out of ear shot, Kiera sat down on one of the crates and said, "Who knew the gods walked among us?"

Both girls started giggling and talking about the various aspects of the commander's physique. They couldn't decide their absolute favorite: the beautiful 8-pack that looked so good all sweaty, or his tight little bum, earning it's commander's salary and then some while he was lugging the crated around.

"Ashelin's crazy for letting him go! I mean Jak's hot, but Mar, that butt!" squealed Tess, who was drooling slightly at the thought of it.

"I have to agree with you on that one," Kiera said, nodding her head, "I could watch it work _all day_!"

I just love how Torn is so oblivious to these girl hitting on him! Should I continue, or not?


	3. Jak X Style!

Here's the new chapter I promised!

Why They Really Join the Underground

Chapter 3

Jak X Style!

The governess of Haven City and its star racer were crammed in a utility closet in their team's garage, sucking face like there was no tomorrow. Which if Krew stuck to his word, was an entirely plausible event. They both resurfaced for a air a minute later looking guilty.

"You know Jak, we shouldn't be doing this," said the tall red headed woman, "I mean, you have a girlfriend and I have...well, whatever Torn is."

Yeah, I know," replied the shorter, blonde hero, "I just got Kiera to forgive me for hooking up with you before. I don't want her to find out and get mad again. I'm still sore from that wrench sometimes."

They looked at each other for a few seconds, then got back to making out. Ashelin pushed him away a minute later and sighed.

"Come on, let's get back to the garage."

He nodded and they left the closet after checking to make sure no one was coming down the hallway.

"Look, you go into the garage and talk to Kiera first," she said bossily, "then I'll come in a few minutes later. That way no one will suspect anything."

He nodded but rolled his eyes as soon as she had turned back around. Man, was she bossy!

They both froze at the end of the hall way when they heard some one coming down the hall up ahead. Jak almost went into panic mode and Ashelin had to comer his mouth with her hand to keep him from blubbering excuses. She peeked over the corner to see a pair of big familiar combat boots that belonged to a pair of big familiar feet.

This made her curios. Why was Torn going into the garage? She released Jak, who had calmed down, and motioned for him to follow her. He complied and they walked on their tippy toes to the door that the commander had gone into.

They got behind the half closed door and looked through the crack, with Jak being on the bottom because of his height (or lack there of), and strained their ears to hear what was being said.

The tall commander walked over to the not so tall mechanic, who removed the head band she was wearing and let her emerald hair loose. She smiled at him.

"Hey Torn, do you need something _worked on_?" she asked him.

He nervously flattened his sepia dreads down and replied, "Well, actually, I was wondering if you've seen my dagger? I can't find it anywhere!"

Her large green eyes flitted over to her work table for a second then returned to his face. Her lips curved up into a devilish smile.

"Hmm, I haven't seen it around the garage. Did you check under the seat in your racer? It might've gotten stuck between the cushion and the floor."

"Hey, that's a good idea," he responded, not seeing her plan nor the fact that what he was looking for was over on a work bench 15 ft away. He walked over to his car and bent in through the window, playing right into her trap.

While he searched for his missing weapon, Kiera pulled out a small silver camera and took a picture quickly. She shoved the little camera into her pocket and walked over to where he was at.

"Any luck?" she asked innocently.

"Not ye– hey, here it– oh never mind that was just the– ouch!"

He withdrew his upper half from the car (with some difficulty due to the size of his shoulders. And ears), cursing loudly.

"My ear got caught o the gas pedal!" he told a laughing Kiera.

"Stop laughing! It's not funny!" he pouted. He crossed his well-defined arms over his lean chest and leaned against the side of the car.

She regained her composure and smiled at him. She put her hand on his muscular bicep and leaned towards him.

"I was just teasin'," she told him in a low purr, batting her eyelashes slowly.

"Yeah, um, well, uhh, I don't like being t-teased," he told her, blushing slightly at her closeness. His voice was still as husky as ever, but he was becoming tongue-tied.

She giggled lightly and looped her arm around his slim waist.

"You're funny," she told him, fondling the ear that got caught gently, "Come on, let's go find your," she paused and looked down, "_dagger_." she looked back up at him with an eyebrow raised.

Torn was incapable of making a coherent word at this point and just nodded at her, his mouth slightly open. They walked out another door on the other side of the garage, Kiera's hand making its way to his perfect little backside.

Jak and Ashelin stood dumb founded, still behind the door. Finally, he spoke.

"Well, err, I don't think they'll notice if we go back to the closet."

"Jak?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

I love writing stupid stuff like this! It's really relaxing. And funny to picture. At least for me...


End file.
